Kaleidoscope Eyes

Has it really been since September?

Sun, 15 Jan 2012 20:50:34 -0500

Wow. Hello! I haven’t been on here since September. It’s probably time for an update of some sort. Having a “blog” isn’t really something I take a huge advantage of because I never really have anything to rant/rave/whine about. I see people use their blogs all the time to just let it all out … eh, not really my thing. But I suppose I’ll try to update this more frequently since it’s always nice to write a little bit and update folks on what’s going on in my life. So, what IS going on in my life? A LOT. I probably owe this journal at least fifty entries. Oh well, we’ll have to settle with one for now. =P

I’m incredibly happy. Mike and I found a place in Scarborough, and we’re so excited to move in. (Feb. 8th!) It’s such a nice little townhouse complex with a fitness center and a dog park and some other awesome perks. We actually have a dishwasher! And an outdoor patio. The exterior and interior are both very nice and the area is extremely convenient for school and errands. It’s also close to my doctor’s office. It’s wonderful. So excited! The ONLY thing I’m kind of mulling over is my work situation … I’m not going to drive all the way into Windham to work a 3.5 hour shift. I’m willing to do weekends. If Mill Creek will take me, give me decent hours, and be flexible around my school schedule, I will absolutely transfer there. I am definitely going to apply to Hannaford, which is right down the road. I just want to wait and get settled into the new place, get acclimated to the area, get settled in with school, then I’ll take on this whole work dilemma.

What else? Oh, new year. I don’t have any resolutions. I’m just trying to get back into the habit of going to the gym. It’s tough. It sucks. I need one of those Military Drill Sergeants to motivate me. Actually scratch that, I might want to die.

School starts this week! I’m trying to get excited, and I think I am. Nervous as usual. I AM going to succeed this semester. Work my butt off if I have to, because if I’m going to actually get my PharmD degree, the time to buckle down is now. Well, okay, it was actually more like a year ago.

Update: FIN.

tastefullyoffensive: via

Mon, 26 Sep 2011 14:47:35 -0400

tastefullyoffensive:

via

red tree by ~nayein

Sun, 25 Sep 2011 20:52:03 -0400

red tree by ~nayein

tastefullyoffensive: via

Thu, 22 Sep 2011 12:03:43 -0400

tastefullyoffensive:

via

Photo

Wed, 21 Sep 2011 21:01:21 -0400

City Escape by ~Rozefire

Wed, 21 Sep 2011 16:23:53 -0400

City Escape by ~Rozefire

Photo

Tue, 20 Sep 2011 13:54:44 -0400

Limbo

Mon, 19 Sep 2011 10:23:46 -0400

So last night I did a great deal of thinking before I actually fell asleep which was roughly around 2:30 AM … I was thinking about my life in the now and how at the moment I feel relatively bored with my life. Now, that’s not to say I’m not happy- but for once (and I almost think this is a good thing) I’m putting things in “the now” as opposed to judging myself for things I’ve done in the past and worrying about the future. Note: if you don’t know me very well, I never relax about ANYTHING. Anyway, as I was saying, lately I’ve been feeling somewhat bored. I’m trying to stay optimistic about the future and I absolutely cannot wait for next semester to begin, but for the time being I’m just kind of in limbo. I am craving a change, preferably in my living situation, which probably will not come as soon as I’d like it to. Saving up money for an apartment and school is tough right now, but I think I can do it by next semester (hopefully!) if I manage my finances better. And my free time! I think the reason I’ve been bored is because I’ve fallen into a mundane routine of the same thing, day to day. And it’s my fault. So, I’m going to make a tentative “to-do list” that will ultimately make me healthier and feel more positive! Some of these things are hobbies and interests of mine that I have drifted away from, but it’s primiarily a medley of things I enjoy.

Baton twirling
Writing
Working out more! (this is a big one)
Get my hair done (change is good!)
Visit my friends in Boston
Volunteer work
Clarinet
ZUMBA!

So, as you can see, I have quite a few ideas floating around in my head. I’ll probably elaborate on those further and definitely add more, but that’s the tentative “me” list! Feeling more positive today already.

the city lights by ~vanerich

Wed, 14 Sep 2011 14:22:21 -0400

the city lights by ~vanerich

Primavera by =Sugarock99

Wed, 14 Sep 2011 14:20:23 -0400

Primavera by =Sugarock99

despicablealexis: Beautiful Day by QueerAngel8900

Tue, 13 Sep 2011 23:02:45 -0400

despicablealexis:

Beautiful Day by QueerAngel8900

Just some self-reflections … I’m looking at these...

Tue, 13 Sep 2011 14:37:19 -0400

Just some self-reflections …

I’m looking at these pictures that are from a little over a year ago and I’m really unhappy with myself. I used to be very in shape and feel great about my body, but over the course of the year I’ve put on a TON of weight. That shounds shallow and typical for a woman of my age, but for me it’s something I’ve been dwelling over. I think at this point there are good and bad things. I can look at myself in the mirror now and say, “Okay, you’re not really hot anymore, but you CAN lose that weight if you try” … a year ago, I was still striving to lose more weight. I would look at myself in the mirror then run on the treadmilll until I threw up. Or throw up food every day. Okay, so I should probably start going to the gym. But does that even matter? Will getting back into a gym routine set off my unhealthy eating habits? I feel like the two go hand in hand. I’m happy with myself in general, but I am terrified to go shopping for jeans. My fat jeans are now my tight jeans! it’s disgusting. I miss when my thighs barely touched and I cought see the bones in my chest. Is that messed up? unhealthy? probably. For now I’m just going to really watch what I eat, and try to make it to the gym at least 4 times a week and hope that it goes well.

your favorite color by `suzi9mm

Thu, 08 Sep 2011 13:17:30 -0400

your favorite color by `suzi9mm

Sings to Sleep by `girltripped

Thu, 08 Sep 2011 10:29:22 -0400

Sings to Sleep by `girltripped

Autumn sunset by *Tkmadbrain

Thu, 08 Sep 2011 10:22:57 -0400

Autumn sunset by *Tkmadbrain

despicablealexis: “Autumn in the Venetian countryside” by...

Tue, 06 Sep 2011 14:52:14 -0400

despicablealexis:

“Autumn in the Venetian countryside” by Gianpietro Brugnoli

the Castle by ~Hamsterfly

Sun, 04 Sep 2011 20:47:31 -0400

the Castle by ~Hamsterfly

Anxiety

Sun, 04 Sep 2011 13:31:12 -0400

I literally don’t want my thought process to be functioning right now. While browsing my iPod I realized the song “Relax, take it easy” pertains to my life, in a nutshell.

the idea of the red by *karil

Sun, 04 Sep 2011 08:43:54 -0400

the idea of the red by *karil

Kaleidoscope Reverie by `alexiuss

Sun, 04 Sep 2011 08:41:28 -0400

Kaleidoscope Reverie by `alexiuss